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Short and sweet

I’m obviously not the most prolific blogger in the world, I hope you weren’t expecting me to be.

I’m sure that there’s far more local information I could be bringing to your attention, dear reader, than I currently am, but sometimes my ability to portray my experiences here on the corner of Myrtle and Nostrand is simply nonexistent.

The purpose of this post in fact has nothing to do with this predicament, I just wanted to share something a friend of mine said. It made my day, I thought it might make yours as well. However, I could not in good conscience fail to acknowledge my lack of new posts.

Grok and enjoy:

People sometimes say, “One day we’ll look back on this and laugh.” My response: “Why wait?”

I love the subway.

It’s one of the primary reasons I moved to New York. It is definitely one of the things that makes New York City the greatest city in the world. Having the G train less than a block away a great advantage. It’s far and away better than having to pay car insurance, even if it cannot always be trusted, kind of like Snidely Whiplash.

Snidely Whiplash

Reasons to love the subway.

 

  • Free information: A paper copy of the map is available for free at any station with a booth. This is a necessity to be able to navigate a system as big as the New York City subway. Not only that, the MTA website will calculate directions utilizing the entire NYC public transit system.
  • Consistency: I know what you’re thinking, consistent? Well consider this, in every hour during the week not considered ‘late night’ the trains run as stated on the map. I’m impressed that such a large system can be run in such a predictable manner.
  • Night Construction: I’ve mentioned this before, but this is especially important on the subway. The subway is a high capacity people moving system, and in a city of 8 million, no matter when you put it out of commission, people are going to be inconvenienced. But by working at night and on weekends, this inconvenience is limited to as few people as possible.
  • Highly connected: No subway ride needs to take more than two line changes (that is, color to color, not local to express). This is because the A line touches every other line including both shuttles. The L line also touches all but two (the 7 and the Brooklyn Botanic Garden shuttle) which are both accessible from the L by the A.
  • MTA employees: Every MTA employee I’ve talked to on a platform has always been very nice and knowledgeable, particularly about service changes. The only times I have ever felt affronted by an MTA employee is when they are in the booths or driving busses.
  • Almost free transit: Unlimited Metro Cards allows for the freedom to move anywhere in the city at any time with the lowest cost per mile possible. For a month, $76 is cheaper than any other form of motorized transportation.

What’s not to love?

New York City subway, you’re my Valentine.

Vexed Yuppifiers

In my six months in New York City I have learned, seen and tasted many things new and wonderful. I’ve also had other not-so-wonderful experiences. I have partied with people I barely knew at birthdays for people I never met, gone from homeless to gentrifier, touched a new layer of snow and been a sucker a time or two. I love this city, but there are things I can’t help but miss about Texas. Among these are

  • Cheap Cajun, Mexican and Catfish
  • Country music radio stations and Dave Moreland
  • The Lone Star Flag

However, there are some things I am glad to be rid of, like mosquitoes and driving.

These differences are more like trade offs than disadvantages. For instance, instead of being able to get tacos and refried beans any time I want, I can enjoy Massaman curry. There’s not a lot of Thai in Texas. Lacking country stations? Well, I don’t like listening to the radio anymore anyway, so I can just listen to it over teh internetz. As for the flag, the I ♥ NY campaign is a fine substitute. Ok, so nothing can take the place of the Lone Star, but I digress.

The Texas Flag

Six months of life in NYC means I’ve spent four months in this yuppie spaceship here in Bedford-Stuyvesant at 756 Myrtle.

This means I’m already a third of the way through my lease, crazy! Although I have to admit

I’ve been shafted.

Yeah you heard me Myrtle LLC. You FAIL. Epically.

Here is what you promised:

  • Laundry
  • Gym
  • Duane Reade
  • Coffee shop
  • Day care
  • Medical Office

The reality?

We did get the laundry around November. Alright, but four washing machines and dryers doesn’t seem like enough for the whole building. The gym is still M.I.A., much to the chagrin of my neighbors who considered it the selling point (fortunately for them, I did see the equipment and a new door has appeared in the lobby). I know what you’re going to say Myrtle LLC, “gym to be provided by outside operator; additional fees apply.” That is unacceptable. Where I come from, someone says something, they mean it and do it. When money is involved, you have a legal obligation to carry through on your promises. Otherwise it’s called bait and switch. What about the Duane Reade? Same song? Sorry, I’ve already tuned into an internet station to listen to the songs I actually want to hear. The other stuff? Pipe dreams. I haven’t even heard one rumor that any of this will happen in the next eight months.

Do we, my fellow yuppifiers, have any recourse? Probably not. You see, conveniently none of this is in the lease, at least not mine. I’m not sure about the legal issues surrounding bait and switch, but I know there are a few lawyers under our roof who could find out.

Yes it’s a rant, but someone had to say it.

Misunderstanding Art

There’s a lot of great art in New York City.
Much of it is in the Subway. I generally am unable to comprehend exactly the message that most of it wants to convey (especially in the Lorimer station, WTF?)

In the category of art I marginally understand, I don’t have to venture far from my yuppie spaceship. Consider the following two pieces on the northwest corner of Myrtle and Nostrand.

New York Will Overcome!

New York Will Overcome!

Underground Murders

Underground Murders

From Bedstuybanana, I gather the second is a memorial.

The first to me is more interesting. What will New York overcome? A friend of mine suggested terrorism, but then I pointed out that the World Trade Center isn’t featured.

This particular phrase reminds me of one you see periodically in Texas. That of, “The South will Rise Again.” This phrase has also bewildered me throughout my youth. Rise to what? For what purpose? To reinstitute slavery? To diplomatically isolate ourselves from the United States? It just doesn’t make any sense to me.

Whatever its message, this art is certainly a less aggressive and more uplifting one. It’s nice to see when you walk out the door.

Now, from Beyond Bed Stuy, more crazy art!

A Japanese Racoon
Kenka, the Japanese raccoon on St. Marks. Can you conquer the Curry Challenge*?This is art from Matt Siren. Some of his work was mentioned in New York magazine recently. I think it’s cool how the girl is featured on the helmets of the robot pharaohs.

Matt Siren door

*Possible? Yes, I have seen it done. Believable? No.

This post is not about Ron Paul.

I have a sneaking suspicion that it is because he’s too red state.

No, this post is about Hillary

Hillary

and Obama.

Obama

Why Hillary and Obama you ask? Well ‘h’ is before ‘o’ in the alphabet.

But seriously folks, the immediate area around everyone’s favorite yuppie spaceship is polling in favor of Obama.

Obama at Cafe Naico

Cafe Naico apparently likes Obama. The first Obama photo was from the convenience store on the corner of Myrtle and Nostrand. For those keeping score, that’s

  1. Obama : 2
  2. Hillary : 0.


Where’s the Hillary love y’all?

Hillary with a sad expression on her face

In any case, the scene at Union Square today was more interesting, with this guy (apparently unaware he is preaching to the choir)

Your signs are corporate!

and the Obama

Obama Supporters

and Hillary

Hillari(ous?)es

pep rallies going on.

This is a serious, not rhetorical question: Would you be swayed by some merry men (and women) yelling louder about their candidate than another slightly softer group yelling for their candidate?

You don’t have to answer, and I wouldn’t be surprised if you didn’t, but it’s a serious question nonetheless.

I do have to admit, the Obama camp did have better cheers, but the Hillary camp had the experience, so it’s really a beautiful microcosm of the whole race set right here in Union Square.

I’m not saying any more in this post because this mission is too important for me to allow myself to jeopardize it.

There is still time to choose.

In this week’s iteration of New York magazine, we get a look at the crime in 2007 and how it has changed since the early nineties. And yes, they point out that Bedford-Stuyvesant is one of the places where crime is moving contrary to the city-wide trend. But! But, it’s not the worst Brooklyn has to offer, which from my understanding is a move in the right direction. Some say gentrification is to blame, others say it is the solution. One thing that is certain is that we have a chance to make a difference in 2008.

I believe in free will. Hence it is my opinion that my choices control the universe. Your (if you indeed exist) choices shape yours. The more you let other people make choices for you, the less the universe will look as you like it. With this in mind, I feel the best part of the entire series of articles is the following quote:

Now is a very good moment to consider the kind of city New York should be in the future, and the kind we don’t want it to be.

As I’ve said before, it’s hard to understand people even when they speak the same language as you. So if something someone says offends you, choose not to engage him. Think about if he really meant it as an offense. If they didn’t, you have saved yourself a lot of trouble by not engaging them. If he did, well he’s a jerk, but here you have an opportunity to reveal how much less of a jerk you are. Imagine what your girlfriend would think about that. If she doesn’t appreciate it, well maybe she would rather be with a jerk in which case I suggest you introduce them to each other.

I would also like to repeat some advice once given by Benjamin Franklin. He proposed it as a way to become wealthy, but it is versatile enough to be applied to more than just monetary gain. That is, cut your bad behavior in half. Want to kill that guy because he disrespected you or your girlfriend? Think twice. Choose to forgive. Save it for the next guy. Hopefully not many people will get to the next guy, but even if they did and followed this advice, there would still be only half the murders there would have been otherwise.

Let’s do good and make dying less of an option in Bed-Stuy 2008 together. Happy New Years!

Do good in 2008 Bed-Stuy

Open 24 hours*

I would like to share some information which may potentially be useful to people living in this neighborhood in the future.

In most places I have been, if a business claims to be open 24 hours, it means that you can transact business at any time, day or night. Often in the wee hours of the morning, you may have only one person running the place or be otherwise inconvenienced, but actually doing business is not hindered. On days which this is not the case notification is prominently placed on points of entry.

Today I realized that in Bed-Stuy, this is not what is meant by ‘Open 24 hours’.

Most of the places in the area surrounding my block close pretty early, but a few convenience stores claim to be open 24 hours a day. Today I put myself in the unfortunate situation of testing this claim. Sadly for me it turned out to be false.

At around 4:15 AM I went looking for an ATM. I had called a car to take me to the airport at 4:30 (I’m writing this on the plane going back to Texas for Christmas) from Myrtle Car service, but I had spent the last of the cash I had on me a few hours earlier. I think that when I arrived at the yuppie mothership around 2:00 my bodega of choice was still open. At that point I assumed I could get some cash out of the ATM just before the car arrived and all would be set. I went to open the door to find that sadly, it was locked. At this point I sprinted to the other end of the block to check the other stores which also claimed to be open 24 hours. They weren’t open either. So I ran back to the first one just to see if anyone was in there, and I saw a cashier counting money, but I determined he wasn’t opening up at this hour.

Then the hue of my fortune changed. I was approached by ‘Tiger’ who had seen me running around like a chicken with my head cut off. He was a really nice beggar who said that in life you have to take it easy and calm down once in a while. He then proceeded to lead me through a breathing exercise. I wasn’t terribly frustrated, and I only half-heartedly did what he said (the car had just pulled up so I needed to check with the driver about finding an ATM), but I really appreciate what he was trying to do. Whenever you feel anxious or frantic, breathing helps. A lot.

After the breathing, he told me his obligatory sad story with the faint scent of beer on his breath. He indicated that he was recently laid off, gets nagged by his wife and has four kids. Clearly this combination is not easy to manage financially. His knowledge of methods of finding inner peace was beginning to make sense.

But, we both knew the score, he wanted money and I am an easy mark. But unlike most other people I meet that fit this description, he wanted to help me and actually had information that I needed — the location of an available ATM.

He was very exuberant and helped me with my bags. I packed light, but just the same it’s the thought that counts. Incidentally the Myrtle Car service driver was cool with taking me to an ATM to get the cash I needed, so there will be no need for running around crazy-like next time. Tiger got in with the driver and me and directed us to the nearby gas station’s ATM. Now my fortune seemed to be brightening, the ATM was working. The driver offered to give me some change and I gave Tiger some dough and he went through the also-obligatory thanking Jesus for my “generosity”. Tiger is a nice guy and lives in the neighborhood and he told me that I will see him around more often. That’s fine by me.

After this, the cab driver told me that he too resided nearby and that having a good report with men like Tiger was a good thing. He also mentioned that there were fewer bad guys around these days. I then enjoyed light mariachi music all the way to the airport.

So what did I learn?

  • 24 hours should come with an asterisk on nearby shops.
  • The gas station is open 24 hours.
  • The Myrtle Car service is great and operates at a consistently high quality 24 hours
  • Don’t spend all your cash two hours before going to the airport, nimrod.

I hope this helps you in the future when you are in Bed-Stuy at four in the morning, in need of cash and not fortunate enough to run into Tiger.

Merry Christmas Internet. Merry Christmas Tiger.

An interesting encounter

In the middle of my weekend ritual walking down Myrtle Ave away from my yuppie spaceship I ran into two gentlemen walking the opposite direction. One decided to address me, and here’s what happened next.

Gentleman 1: Yo
Me: What’s up?
Gentleman 1(indignantly): What’s up?
Me(thinking he might have been talking to someone behind me): Are you talking to me?
Gentleman 1: Yeah, do you know where you at?
Me: Yes, I’m on Myrtle Ave.
Gentleman 2: [Something unintelligible to Gentleman 1 as they walk past me]
Me: Have a nice day.
Gentleman 1: Shut up.

Are you as confused as I was?

I don’t think Gentleman 1 appreciated me being in the neighborhood, but other than being quasi-threatening he left me alone while Gentleman 2 just seemed disinterested in the whole affair. Would Bed-Stuy have been a better response? I was excited that someone initiated a conversation with me that didn’t end up asking me for money, but it’s not like we discussed the finer points of modern philosophy.

Is it that obvious that I’m an outsider? If so, what’s wrong with some new faces in the nabe?

Here’s a nice video that is a good introduction to Bedford-Stuyvesant, but I do think it reveals a wish for exclusivity still remains. Check the comments around 5:20. Of course, the person in the video provides a good rationalization for her view and nice examples, but it is ultimately exclusionary.

This is not to say that this view isn’t held by people in other communities which are ‘historically’ this or ‘historically’ that, but merely a subjective observation.

While in college I questioned the long term effects of encouraging so-called ‘diversity’, that is increasing minority enrollment for its own sake. Imagine if you could pick 100 people in any random square mile in the United States and have those people be as close to the national breakdown of ethnicities as possible, what would the consequences be?

We’d be a much more homogeneous society in some sense, there wouldn’t be places like Bed-Stuy or Chinatown or the Hamptons. Places seemingly defined by the demographic they are known for would be a thing of the past. Would that be a bad thing? What would Chinatown look like in such a scenario? Would the look change just because of who lives there, or would there be a push to preserve the façade? Anywhere you went the people would look the same. To preserve remnants of the ethnic uniqueness of an area a false shell would have to be maintained.

Is that what we want?

How could we not want it?

Identity

In a comment Choco Man says:

You need to tell us more about yourself. What’s your bio? (Did I hear you mention Texas? Is that where you’re from?) Tell us more…

A few days later, bed-stuy banana had this to say about anonymity:

My last post has been nastily commented on twice by ‘anonymous.’ I encourage dialogue, whether it be positive or negative, but at least have the courage to state your name and take ownership for your words.

That last post had been an intriguing commentary on my post summing up my thoughts on gentrification.

I didn’t leave the comment, just in case you were wondering =)

Choco Man, I appreciate your interest in me personally, however, this is not a personal blog. Granted, I’m a person blogging about stuff that happens to me and what I think about it, but that doesn’t make this a personal blog. Of course in it’s original form this blog was distinct from a personal blog, but now it’s not as clear. With the relaxation of the constraints I had originally laid out, the distinction is not at all apparent. Does it exist?

Maybe! Who knows?

In any case, I still do not intend this blog to be about me in the sense that most personal blogs are about their authors. I have revealed a few of facts about myself, and if you look at old posts you can learn a bit more about me. A few of the ones that I think help in understanding my perspective are:

  • I am Texan.
  • I like Mathematics.
  • I am a recent graduate.

For the highly motivated reader, there is of course the option of actually determining who I am. This is not an impossible task as I have made no attempt to conceal my identity other than not mentioning it here.

The drawback to this is that even if someone wants to know who I am, they will have to find out elsewhere. This is due to the fact that (barring a security compromise) I have complete control over the content which appears here, and I have no intention of releasing that information here.

It’s not because I’m ashamed of what I say or anything like that. Again, finding my information is not impossible, but it is fun keeping up with what I have revealed and considering all the possibilities of what people might assume about me. It allows me to gauge the (projected) personality of a person who responds to my words.

Plus, this kind of quasi-anonymous writing is a little mysterious and my hope is that it will keep people reading.

I am a racist.

I’m sorry that I haven’t mentioned this earlier, as I had planned on making such a post at some point, but I obviously took too long.

The musical Avenue Q has a song which conclusively shows that I am a racist. The following lines in particular:

Everyone’s a little bit racist

Sometimes.

Doesn’t mean we go

Around committing hate crimes.

Am I too racist? That is, so much so that it is one of the first things people think about me? I haven’t taken a poll recently, so I don’t know. I also don’t know of a reasonable way to quantify one’s racism so I can’t answer this question to my satisfaction.

Because of this I have no other justifiable course of action other than to try to be less racist than I currently am. I have already attempted to implement this course of action, but I fail frequently, which is why I need your help. If I say something racist, don’t let me get away with it.

Secondly I would like to make a statement on the issue of ‘coded racism‘. My aim with this method of communication is to unambiguously convey my thoughts to anyone interested in them. Therefore I have no interest in masking my meaning in code.

I also want those reading to enjoy themselves and so I try to inject humor occasionally which often requires certain ambiguities in order to elicit the desired reaction. If something I say doesn’t make sense or seems like ‘coded racism’ then please comment and ask about it. Then I can clarify for you or you can point out the plank in my eye that I am too blind to see. Speculation is not required as I am happy to address any questions that might arise.

I agree that ‘coded racism’ is worse than outright racism primarily because it is a contemptible form of deception which I loathe. An example of this is when my hometown high school (a few years after several teachers retired and I graduated) was found to be academically unacceptable by the state of Texas. They blamed it on ‘a single subsection’ of test scores. They were just as wrong as a child believing that it was only the straw that broke the camel’s back.

In conclusion, I hope that my being a cheap racist bastard will not distract you from learning more about the issues which I address.

P.S. I like the moniker ‘yuppie spaceship‘ so much that I will from this point forward only refer to the building that I live in under this title. Thanks bed-stuy banana!